Christmas Spirt is Like an Infectious Disease

Because this is how my family rolls.  And what happens when I'm put in charge of decorating.  If only I had a light up baby Jesus then the scene would be complete.


My mother closed the shutters to prevent the neighbors and homeowners association from being able to enjoy our festive decorations.

Because Chuck Norris Loves Christmas

Who doesn't need a Chuck Norris collectible revolver for only $1,995?  Chuck Norris that's who.

If you went to shoot Chuck Norris with a gun, the bullets would run away.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a gun to shoot someone in the head. 
Chuck Norris wears a gun only to hand it to the enemy and beat him with it.

Holiday versus Christmas

There has been some debate lately over the usage of the phrase Happy Holidays or Seasons Greetings versus Merry Christmas with one church going so far as to sponsor a website to call businesses out on their lack of Christmas decorations and so-called spirit.  I mean really people, this is why outsiders hate Christians and by association, Americans.  For one, aren't there more important things going on in the world to care about, like starving children living on the brink of war/genocide/death throughout the world that will never know over-commercialized event you are complaining about?  And more importantly, didn't Jesus teach us to be inclusive and loving of all people?  What's the matter with respecting the fact that Christmas is not the only religious holiday celebrated this time of  year?

In fact, Christianity isn't even the oldest religion observing a significant holiday this month.  And for that matter, Christmas day was chosen for its connection to pagan traditions connected to solstice and feasts to the dead rather than the actual birth date of Christ.  The origins of many so-called Christmas traditions associated with the holiday are in fact rooted in paganism and not historical Christianity including: evergreen trees, stockings, yule logs, and more.


Indeed, Jesus may be the reason for YOUR season, but for much of the world he is not the reason for their festivities and just because they're different than your own and what you know, these holidays should not be looked down upon as second-rate.  In the US people usually think of Hanukkah as the "other" holiday celebrated in December, however many world religions consider this a holy time of year.  Other religious holidays being celebrated in December 2010 include:

2nd-9th
Hanukkah- Judaism

7th
Hijra- Islam New Year

8th
Bodhi Day (Rohatsu)- Buddhism
Immaculate Conception of Mary- Catholicism

16th
Ashura- Islam

16th-25th
Posadas Navidenas- Hispanic Christmas

21st
Yule- Wicca/Pagan Northern hemisphere
Litha- Wicca/Pagan Southern hemisphere
Yule- Christianity

26th
Feast of the Holy Family- Catholicism
Death of Prophet Zarathushtra- Zoroastrianism

28th
Holy Innocents- sects of Protestantism

31st
Watch Night- sects of Protestantism

Now for the Who

Well since I now have a "real" job (as some friends like to put it....consulting apparently doesn't count); I'm getting ready for the leaving the continent again part.  As you know, I am going to be raising funds for a rainwater project, GHARP, in Kenya.  What I didn't mention is that the position is supported by an umbrella organization, Skillshare International.


Skillshare supports development workers in partner organizations across Europe, Africa, and Asia.  While the partner organization is the key implementer of their projects; Skillshare supervises monitoring and evaluation as well as financial management. This is a huge commitment for the organization; in 2009-10 they supported 113 development workers throughout the world.  Funding not only provides living expenses for the workers but most importantly funds important programming such as: reducing gender-based violence, supporting rural livelihoods, creating a human rights culture, enhancing community capacity for self-development, empowering youth, and improving the lives of people living with disabilities, just to name a few.

So while I'm off doing the boring stuff (physicals, dental appointments, and packing) take a minute and check out my Just Giving page and help me raise £500 to support this great organization.  If you're still looking for a great Christmas gift, look no further, 'tis the season to give the gift that gives back to those less fortunate.

Photo credit: www.Skillshare.org

Stay tuned!  Plans are in the works for another fun opportunity to show your support while eating, drinking, and being merry this holiday season.  And, if you want to make things more interesting, leave me a suggestion in the comments section of what I can do to show all of my loyal friends and donors my appreciation for every £100 raised toward my goal of £500 (approximately $780).  Keep it classy, people; this will be performed in a public, child-friendly arena.

A New Start in a Familiar Place

"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be." Douglas Adams

So for those of you who haven't heard the news, I am headed back to Africa.  No definite return date yet, but I will be in Nairobi sometime in January.  As you know, I took a job last January that moved me to Kenya to support their Sudan office.  This new opportunity as a Fundraising Officer with the Greater Horn of Africa Rainwater Partnership- Kenya Rainwater Association will bring me back to Kenya, a place I grew to love over the eight months I spent there this year.  

Don't get me wrong; it's not that I haven't loved my time back in Dallas catching up with friends and family and going to charity events and holiday parties, but I am very much looking forward to returning to Nairobi.  I know most of you think I'm crazy; why would I give up Tex Mex, culture, and First World living for a low paying job in Africa?  So to help you understand, here are just the top two of many reasons I decided not to stay Stateside: 1) Yes, there are a lot of issues that need to be worked on at home, but there are many people who are willing and enjoy working for nonprofits.  However, how many of those people want to move across the world to do it?  I think that those of us who are willing to do so should do everything we can to get over there and get working.  There's a lot to do and many, many people who need our help.  2) Nairobi is a great place to live (minus the pollution and crime; which, don't lie to yourself, is everywhere).  It is metropolitan and has the perks of big city living (sushi, anyone?) while being just a hop, skip, and a jump from "real" Africa.  I love being able to hop in the car and drive an hour or two away from town to experience nature and animals that many people will never get to see in their lifetime.

Life and the Pursuit of Who Knows What

So as I was reminded recently it's been awhile since I posted on here; not to worry, I am still alive and well and haven't run off into the bush...yet.  However, for those of you who have been living under a rock and have not been following along on Facebook, I will give you the full update of what's been going on with me for the last four months.

Around the end of May/beginning of June I decided to quit my job at ALARM.  It was a decision not easily made as 1) I enjoyed my position and the opportunity to work with my colleagues to provide opportunities and resources for ALARM's programs in Sudan and 2) I have never left a position without another job lined up and with the current economic climate it was a struggle to listen to my gut.  A long story short as to why I left: there were security concerns that were not being addressed to my satisfaction in regards to a permanent move to Juba, South Sudan.

Fortunately I have some great friends that I've met while in Kenya who were very supportive of my decision.  I have been staying at a friend's flat while job searching and doing some consulting work for a local NGO and an IT solutions company.  I was scheduled to come home in early September but prolonged my stay another month to continue networking and job searching here.  Happily I have a couple of tentative offers that excite me but they will not become firm opportunities until funding becomes available.  OR If anybody reading this post has an awesome job in East Africa/D.C. they'd like to offer me please feel free  :)

That said, I'm not sure what the future has in store for me, but I've stopped attempting to plan everything and am trying to go with the flow and make the most of the situation.  How often in life are we given the opportunity to stop and really enjoy ourselves and not be stressed out about the daily grind?  Taking a breather from all of that has been really great.  In the last few months I have been able to visit a dear friend in Cairo, watch the Great Migration at the Masai Mara, climb Mt. Longonot, visit the hot springs at Lake Magadi, hike the gorge at Hell's Gate, be a beach bum in Mombasa and Diani, and have fun with giraffes and baby ellies.  (Disclaimer: Of course I've also been job searching, volunteering, and working on my papers to finish up my masters degree as well.  It's not all fun and games, Mom and Dad). 

So a big thank you to everyone in Kenya who has made my time here memorable and have helped me keep my sanity throughout some of the crazy times the last few months.  I'll miss you all but will remember you always.  And thank you to all of my friends and family at home who were supportive of my decision to move here and subsequently stick around while looking for a new job.  I'm happy I will be home to see you all soon and can't wait to catch up on your lives as well (over copious amounts of Tex Mex and margaritas of course)!

xx
Captain Awesome

Keeping Up with the Jones': Let's Not

It seems like every time I turn around there is another article about the LGBT community being marginalized in sub-Saharan Africa. I shouldn't be surprised considering the lack of basic rights for the gay community in most countries in Africa and the fact that same-sex sexual activity is deemed illegal in 36 countries throughout the continent. During an informative (and I use that term loosely, it was in actuality a propaganda laced "look at how great we are" session) meeting with the Rwandan Human Rights Commission last summer I was informed that there are no gays in Rwanda and being gay is not an African problem and is only an issue found in western countries so therefore there is no need for the Commission to create to any laws to protect gay rights.

This month, a seventeen year old in Senegal will stand trial for sexual acts "against nature" and two other men were convicted just weeks prior on identical charges and sentenced to two and five years based only on denunciations from neighbors.  Just this past May, after being sentenced to 14 years in prison for 'unnatural acts and gross indecency', for celebrating their engagement, a gay couple was pardoned on "humanitarian grounds only" by Malawi's president after receiving huge international criticism.  That same month, gay activists in Zimbabwe were arrested for posting a letter in their office that criticized President Mugabe's opposition to homosexuality and subsequently abused by police.  Earlier this year another Malawian man was arrested for putting up gay-rights posters.  

In other news, an anti-gay bill is continuing to gain popularity in Uganda. Highlights include: "prison terms for Ugandans who fail to report a homosexual within 24 hours; lifelong prison sentences for a single homosexual act; and the death sentence for a range of acts, including having gay sex while HIV-positive, having gay sex with a disabled person or being classified as a "serial offender" — that is, someone who has gay sex more than once." A recent interview with David Bahati, author of the bill, revealed that he wants this to become a model throughout Africa. He is saying, "this is a project to eradicate homosexuality in Uganda. They're not saying, 'This is a reform.' They're saying, 'We can do this. We are at the crux.'

Even in the U.S. where we pride ourselves on being more culturally sensitive to subjects such as these we are still debating whether or not gay marriage should be allowed.  Anytime I see any article posted about this debate a shocking outpouring of hatred always follows in the comment section.  Why are people so vitriolic when discussing other people's personal lives?  How does one person's commitment to another person effect anybody else?  And if I hear one more religious tirade about God condemning homosexuals, I literally might scream.  My God loves all of his children; red and yellow, black and white, gay or straight, all are precious in his sight.  A friend posted a particularly entertaining (read: sarcastic) retort she found on facebook about "why gay marriage is wrong" that I find particularly appropriate in response to many of the close-minded arguments on this topic.

So my response is this: stand up and speak out against the marginalization of your fellow human beings.  Who knows when your government is going to decide that how you live your personal life is wrong and punishable by jail and/or death.  Find an organization in your community to lend  your support.  In Kenya check out Gay and Lesbian Coalition's website to learn more about their partner organizations and community activism.  International human rights organization, International Gay & Lesbian Human Rights Commission, also has resources on how to take action worldwide.

Mount Longonot or bust

That's right.  I, Captain Awesome, hiked up a mountain.  However if it had not been for my awesome experienced hiker friend, Cecile, I would be sitting forlornly about a third of the way up.  I blame my ineptitude on the high elevation and my inability to breath.

At this point, I was just happy to have made it thus far.

We began the adventure with an unpleasant encounter with the ticket seller at the park entrance that consisted of her not giving us a student rate so, in my opinion, she and her superiors could pocket the additional $10 per person.  Living in Kenya has opened my eyes to a the world of corruption and how far it reaches.  After listening to many excuses, changes in argument, and newly made up rules, we unhappily conceded to further corruption and pay the full fee.

The merry band

Despite the unfortunate beginning to our day our merry band of five proceeded up the mountain.  She doesn't look like much but she packs a punch in the first leg of the journey.  It's less tiring than difficult as the initial ascent is quite steep and slippery with loose ash.  I also underestimated the effects of altitude on my hiking ability.  The base of the volcano is 2150 meters above sea level with the peak reaching 2780 meters asl.  All of my daily walks around Nairobi were no preparation for my lungs.

Once we finally made it to the rim I hung out with my ipod while the rest of the group hiked around the ledge.  My unfortunate fear of heights and tendency to be clumsy and fall made me think twice about walking around a narrow and, in some parts, steep ledge that might lead to my untimely demise in a volcanic crater.  I almost forgot to tell you all about the birds and how they too were trying to kill me!  It could have been a Hitchcock film.  These two birds the size of penguins with HUGE beaks started dive bombing me for my leftover lunch goodies.  Just sitting on the trail with nothing to keep me from falling down the side of the mountain was freaking me out enough as it was, so when the birds started coming for me I was afraid I might be tempted to get up and run which would inevitably lead to the discovery of my crumpled remains in the crater below.  Thinking only of my friends and how traumatized they would be by this scenario, I slowly scooched away from the baggie the killer birds desired and made my way a safe distance away.  It was a narrow escape; just moments passed before the birds attacked the defenseless baggie and devoured the crumbs inside. 

View from the top of Mt. Longonot of Rift Valley and the crater.

Stay tuned for tales and travails of my previous trip to Lake Magadi....

Survival Guide to Turning 30 or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb

The stress of turning the big 3-0 is definitely compounded when you live in a foreign country far away from your family and friends and are currently jobless and homeless.  Fortunately for me, when I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.  True story.
  
Stressed but awesome.  

Survival Guide Tips:
1. Start prepping everyone for your upcoming big day.  Explain that just because the word "day" is part of the word "birthday" this does not mean that one should only celebrate for one day.  Especially when that day is a lame one, like a Wednesday.  Yes, Wednesday, I'm calling you out for being a sucky day.  Try to do better next time; strive to be Friday, Friday knows what's up.

2. If your birthday happens to fall smack dab in the middle of the week plan fun events for the weekends on either end. 
Pre-birthday weekend festivities: 4th of July BBQ
Post-birthday weekend festivities: Trip to Masai Mara to watch the Great Migration

3. Surround yourself with people who have already turned the life-changing age so they can provide reassurances that having a 3 in front of your age is not so scary.  Shun your younger friends who take enjoyment from your downward spiral into adulthood.  Take names so you can exact revenge when their big day comes.

4. Ignore your friends' suggestion that you have a drink for every year you are turning.  "That could be interesting" is not the correct response.  Ignore their rationalizations that 30 drinks over a week is completely possible and the fact that you live in Kenya is not a good enough reason for you to try and accomplish this feat.

5. Chocolate is the key to getting you through this nerve-wracking time.  Little known fact*: Chocolate will end world hunger, cure cancer, and, if used correctly, bring world peace.  
*More of a hypothesis than a fact.  But it is known to induce happiness when taken in large portions.

6. Give yourself permission to pig out at your birthday dinner AND eat dessert.
 Mmmm, flan.

7. Realize that being another year older just means you have maintained your awesome status for an entire year and embrace the fact that you get to bask in your awesomeness indefinitely.

Life After the World Cup

Life in Kenya and the mania surrounding the World Cup brought out the very hidden, unknown soccer fanatic in me.  I am certain that I have watched more sports in general and soccer specifically than ever before in my life.  However, now that the World Cup has concluded and Team Orange sadly lost to the Spanish hotties, I'm not sure what to do with all of my free time.  Life before the World Cup is hard to remember so I've come up with this list of suitable replacement activities for how to spend your new found leisure time.

1. Stock up your google reader with an excessive amount of blogs.  My current favorite is Hyperbole and a Half; Allie Brosh is hilarious.  And she likes David Sedaris and Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.  It will suck you in and you then you will look up and realize that you've been reading blogs rather than being productive for hours on end.  Don't say I didn't warn you.

2. Check facebook frequently.  Upload pictures to facebook from the fun times you had watching the World Cup.  Read through your newsfeed to catch up on all the posts your friends made while you were sleeping.  Look to see if any of your friends are online to chat with even though it's 3 am their time and 11 am where you live.  Cyberstalk Alan Tudyk.  

3. Research the next two 25 page papers you have due in a month.  Do this instead of reading blogs and checking facebook.

4. Catch up on correspondence.  Respond to old emails.  Write new ones.  Look to see if any of your friends are on gchat even though it's 3 am their time and 11 am where you live.

5. Work on consulting/volunteer work.  Meet with volunteer agency.  Write proposals.  Be productive in general.  

6. Go to the mall and wander aimlessly, like you're a 15 year old.  Go to another mall and watch Twilight, like you're a 15 year old. 

7. Be touristy.  Visit the giraffes and feed them.  Visit the elephants and adopt one.  Visit the park and play safari. 

8. Write a blog post.  Brainstorm new blog posts.  Look through pictures to see if there is anything entertaining/random you can include in your blog post.  

 You're welcome.


9. Walk a mile to Java.  Sit, read/research, eat, listen to your ipod, stare aimlessly into space, people-watch, walk back.

10. Recruit friends to entertain you. 
      a. Watch numerous bootleg movies.  Brainstorm new movies/tv shows to buy for only 100 KSH. 
      b. Go to dinner/drinks/late night-early morning dance parties at various shady establishments.
      c. Convince them to cook dinner for you in trade for wine and beer.